Tuesday 3rd October 2006

My mistress seems to have got it into her head that until I have my stitches out I should be being careful and not leaping about too much. I do have some bruising in some very delicate places, so she may be right. I keep giving everything a good lick but I will be happier when the purple coloured bit returns to normal. I was alarmed when she told me she will be the one removing my stitches. Since when has she had any type of medical qualification? Does she really think I am going to let a complete novice remove stitches from such delicate bits of me? She tried to reassure me that she has removed stitches from an animal before but it turns out that that was a female cat. Does she really think a cat would be an acceptable comparison? Thursday is the appointed day so we will just have to wait and see.

It was sad taking my mistress’s friend to the airport yesterday. She spoiled me rotten whilst she was here and I had grown very fond of her. She did say she wondered about trying to smuggle me out with her but as she planned to put me in her luggage rather than pay for a seat in first class I wasn’t all that keen on the plan. I don’t suppose I would have got that far as my mistress has taken charge of my passport. She said after my little outing the other week I couldn’t be trusted and she didn’t want to risk finding out I’d gone when she got a post card from South America. Personally I think she has been reading too many crime novels. As if I would head for South America, I was thinking more in terms of the Cayman Islands or Bermuda. It’s a shame I have never got any pocket money left to deposit in an offshore account in readiness for my escape!