Wednesday 8th December 2010

My Mistress’s attempts to make the summerhouse look like Santa’s grotto have not gone according to plan. The way the little lights are lighting it up in the dark is positively creepy and she thinks it is probably more ‘Hammer house of horrors’ than ‘Santa’. I did suggest that as a finishing touch she might like to add the fluorescent skeleton that we have for Halloween. It has certainly given her idea for the end of October next year! At least she has worked out a way to put them on a time switch so that it no longer looks as though it’s thundering and lightning when I wake up in the night. I was up and begging to get into bed with her before I realised it was only the Christmas lights flashing. It’s hard to appear nonchalant when you have just shot out of your basket and are whimpering by the side of the bed.

The internet game that my Master spends his time playing on has had a major upgrade. Apparently there are now 12 million people around the world as obsessively playing on their computers. This would be a perfect time for some advertising campaigns directed at the members of the family who are not playing and can’t get a word out of the person that is. I am also concerned about the neglected pets that aren’t getting walked and stroked because their owners are too busy playing on the game. Of course I realise none of you are players, otherwise you’d be too busy to read this, which means I can be as rude as I like about it and not insult any of you. My Mistress has joked that she could walk naked through the house when my Master is playing on World of Warcraft and he wouldn’t even notice. James as begged her not to put that one to the test. I’ve simply asked if she could close the curtains first.