Tuesday 16th June 2009

The news all seemed to be depressing yesterday so I thought I might make up my own to cheer everyone up. The only problem is that nothing exciting seems to be happening at the moment so it would have to be completely fictitious. We could announce that in a reversal of taxation, the Government will be paying us money rather than taking it away, so that we rather than they, can spend our way out of the recession. If that were to happen, I wonder where everyone would spend the extra money. If I gave you £50 and told you that you had to spend it today, what exactly would you spend it on? I think the obvious answer is food, alcohol or clothing but I wonder just how imaginative people could be. My Mistress said she would spend it on some grass to fill in the holes that Shadow has left, but I pointed out that Shadow was likely to dig that up so there was little point.

I suppose we could have some real good news, like the swine flu pandemic coming to an end and a vaccination having been developed, but that doesn’t seem to be happening any time soon.

In other local news, my Mistress dropped her watch on Sunday and it stopped working. It has now been taken to the watch hospital where it is hoped it will make a speedy and inexpensive recovery. She thinks it will be too much to hope that it’s just the battery that needs replacing, given the coincidence of the dropping and the stopping! Oh, I suppose the water being cut off is also news. It seems to be a burst water main a couple of villages away, so if you are in the area, be warned it is unlikely that many people round here have had much of a wash!