Sunday 16th September 2008

I am a little concerned about all the news on investment banks. Where is it safe for a dog to keep his bones? Are they still safe buried in the garden or should I be moving them to a more secure location? It’s an important consideration. It seems nothing is safe any more. If Governments aren’t prepared to bail out major banks, what chance does a dog have for recovering his bone store if the worst happened?

The sheep have now been around for quite a time and it seems they are no longer the least bit ‘worried’ by me. I psyche myself up in a morning, to look my most menacing and then go bounding up to the fence only to find them standing in a line, staring back at me and continuing to munch the grass without the least concern. I’m going to have to work on being menacing. If I can’t get three sheep to take any notice I don’t stand much chance with anything more ferocious.

The fridge seems to be full of carrots for James to take for the horses. I keep jumping up and down and saying “What about me? I like carrot,” but no one seems to be especially interested. I’ve tried rubbing some white chalk into my brown bits to make them paler so that my Mistress will feed me carrots to make them go darker but it turns out that she’s not stupid, although the white patches I leave everywhere may have been a bit of a giveaway. I’ve tried reminding her that as treats go, this is one of the less fattening ones, but she keeps pointing out that if I eat anything in big enough quantities I will get fat. Come on, how many fat vegetarians do you see?