Thursday 1st May 2008

After the times when the horses he is around buck, James said to me yesterday, “How come nothing makes you spook?” “Easy” I said, “When you’ve lived with my Mistress this long, nothing will freak you out either.” After all, if I reacted every time she did something odd, then I would be all over the place. She’s got a note on her desk saying ‘send anonymous letter to Frome’. All right I thought, I could take that at face value and perhaps I’ll be visiting her in prison sometime soon. In the end my inquisitive nature got the better of me and I asked what the anonymous letter was about. It turns out that I don’t need to worry, it’s a short story and she has a competition to send it to. I must admit I was more than a little relieved.

Continuing the theme of her nutty ideas, she is absolutely determined to bring some more Entlebuchers into England. I’m not complaining but it does seem like an awful lot of work. I quite like the idea of having my own pack, but has she thought of the implications? If I don’t manage to cross my legs long enough when we go for a walk, that is one little bag of pooh to carry all the way round the walk and I can tell by the look on her face that she doesn’t exactly find that pleasant. If she achieves he ambition of there being four of me, I think she is going to have to carry ‘carrier bags’ of pooh in a worst case scenario! I wonder if she’s thought of that. It would make sense to live in the middle of nowhere but I’m not sure the rest of the family are quite so keen on that idea.