Saturday 7th March 2009

My views are not being adequately taken into account for the house extension. I want underfloor heating. I don’t suppose there’s a dog out there that wouldn’t support my view. I also want carpet everywhere. I don’t want to be asked to sit on a cold floor. If we have to have tiles, wood or stone, I want a budget for more rugs and dog beds to be strategically placed throughout those rooms. I also want assurances that no one will ask me to sit or lie down on any cold floor.

I am also concerned that I get all the duff jobs. ‘Find the sewage manhole for me would you Alfie?’ Why me? Oh I might be good at sniffing things out. I might go round with my nose to the ground the whole time, but why should I be the one to search for the sewage line? When I tried objecting, my Mistress did try pointing out that I was the one who has adopted rifling through the kitchen bin as my new favourite pastime. Ok, I admit it, I may have developed a penchant for refuse, but you’d be amazed at how much that is edible gets thrown away. I’ll grant my Mistress might just have a point that I have been a little unwell on a couple of occasions and have had to get her up to take me outside, but maybe if they gave me the scraps in the first place instead of putting them in the bin, they wouldn’t have gone off by the time I got to them. At the end of the day, they really only have themselves to blame.