Friday 9th June 2006

One of my favourite household chores has been taken away from me. All my own fault really. It was my job to go and get the post from the post box at the bottom of the drive. Unfortunately I have been getting these urges recently. No, not what you’re thinking. I just can’t stop myself from running off into next door’s garden to see if I can find Matilda. As cats go she is a bit of a recluse, which just adds to the challenge of trying to find her. It drives me to distraction when my mistress has been round to next door’s house and comes back smelling of Matilda. Anyway, now it means I get left shut behind the garden gate whilst my mistress goes down on her own, very disappointing.

I am keeping out of my mistress’s way for a while. She is having one of those days. Firstly she trapped her finger in the drawer and bruised it really badly. Then as though that was not enough she ran over my foot with a door. On balance I think keeping out of the way is by far the safest option.

Now I am really not sure what my master and mistress were trying to prove but all three of us tried going out in my mistress’s car. By rights it is a two seater car and by my reckoning there were three of us! My master drove, whilst my mistress sat in the passenger seat and had this strange notion that I might be happy to sit in the footwell. Doh! Does she really think I am going to sit where I can’t see out of the window? I started with my back legs on the floor and my front paws on her legs, but that wasn’t very stable. So I hauled myself up onto her lap. I may be 22kg but I can still be a lap dog. As it turned out, I was very comfortable and quite liked the arrangement. What I couldn’t understand is that my mistress wasn’t so keen and said she thought perhaps we wouldn’t try it again. Shame! I was somewhat bemused that the journey ended with window shopping up and down the high street of the town we live in. Why go when the shops are shut? What is the point in that? I was also a bit fed up as my master made me stop to look in the men’s clothes shop windows and my mistress made me stop at the women’s but did they even take my down the road with the pet shop on? No! Was I given the chance to gaze longingly at new collars and toys? No! They took no notice of my protests however much I tried pulling in the other direction.