Saturday 19th July 2008

I have been thinking about trying my paw at topiary. It comes of having looked at a number of magazines recently, which have had photographs of the handy work that people across the country have achieved with their hedges. I thought to myself, Alfie Dog, I thought, there are a lot of boring hedges round by where we live, you could do something about it. I’m not sure whether my lack of artistic talent is likely to stand in my way. I was reading something that said a basic bird shape is fairly easy to achieve, although looking at the picture it was more a wingless bird than an eagle in full flight and from the shape of its stomach it was probably a flightless, overfed pigeon. Fortunately, I mentioned my idea to my Mistress before taking the plan any further. This gave her the opportunity to explain I couldn’t go cutting away at other people’s hedges, particularly not as inexperienced as I am and especially not ‘uninvited’. I’m thinking of having some business cards printed, ‘Alfie Dog, Topiary Services’. Let’s face it, I don’t have to mention on the card that I don’t know what I’m doing. It doesn’t hold back any of the other people with neatly printed business cards.

My Mistress has been working out what date she can go to Switzerland to meet the people there who we are hoping to have a puppy from. I’m sulking; at the moment she is proposing to go by train, which will mean that I can’t go with her. I was trying to persuade her to drive, but then she reminded me just how long we were in the car the last time we drove there and apparently the drive from here would be even further. I guess I shall just have to wait to meet the puppy when she arrives in England. Do you think if she has been to a Swiss finishing school, her manners will me much more refined than mine?