Wednesday 28th June 2006

Well my mistress went to collect her dress yesterday. After being late last week she left in plenty of time and got there 45 minutes early. Fortunately it fits, which I think is down to my eating so many of the biscuits on her behalf. Now all she has to do is get it to England in one piece. Lay it across the back seat the shop said. Just a small problem, her car hasn’t got a back seat. I suggested having the roof down and trailing it behind the car but she didn’t think that was helpful.

I am seriously worried about the levels of aggression being shown by the woodpeckers. So the nut container ran out. That is no justification for throwing the thermometer which communicates with my mistress’s weather station, onto the floor. I said my mistress should simply refuse to feed them, and of course give me the nuts instead. She seemed to feel it might be better to meet their demands and refill the container immediately before they set about taking any further action. It really isn’t any good to cave in to the demands of these terrorists. You have to make a stand. I did ensure I ate all the nuts that fell around the bottom of the bird table as she did it as my mark of protest.

I went to youth club yesterday and it was brilliant. Everyone was so pleased to see me, it made me feel a bit guilty for not coming last week. I played pool with one of the deer, but he could reach the table more easily than I could, although he said he had problems getting his hoof round the cue. He couldn’t have had that much problem as he beat me quite convincingly. I was telling them all about the football on the television. After I had explained what a television was, we got onto what is involved in playing football and now they want to try. I don’t know all the rules and have always thought it was a bit pointless, but maybe if it is a game with my friends we would have fun. I wonder how we can learn how you are supposed to play. I could try watching some a bit more carefully to see if I can work it out. The problem is that a lot of what my mistress and master watch is in Dutch, my mistress says it is a choice of that, French or German as not all the games are on the English channel we can get. Even the names of the players sound different the way they pronounce them.