Saturday 2nd August 2008

As the car was being packed I was starting to think there wasn’t going to be room for me, however my Mistress reassured me that of all the passengers I would take priority. We are almost ready for the off, but I think I’m the only one who is actually ready. I can hear them now on the final routine before take off. “Will you please have breakfast?” “Yes you do need to eat something before we go.” “No we aren’t stopping in half an hour to get you a burger.” “No the boxes of food aren’t all for you to eat in the car on the way there, they’ve got to last for the whole holiday.” “Have you packed everything you need?” “Well why is this still sitting just here then?” “Have you been to the toilet?” “I don’t care if you don’t think you want to go right now. We aren’t stopping for you to go at the side of the road.” “If that one’s occupied go and use the other one.” It’s exactly the same every time we go anywhere.

Me, I’m just a simple soul. I get up, I eat breakfast, I go outside to the toilet, I come in and get back into bed. Whether I sleep on my rug on the back seat of the car or in my bed under my Mistress’s desk is nothing more than incidental to the main occupation of spending my morning asleep, saving my energy to attack the afternoon with vigour and aplomb.

Oo they’re ready. I’d better go. Have fun and I’ll drop you a note or two while I’m away.