Saturday 19th August 2006

I am having too much fun to write very much. It turns out that I am in a place called the Ardennes. I am now thoroughly confused as I thought that was a type of pate rather than a place. My mistress has tried to explain that it is a place where the type of pate comes from, a bit like Champagne. I told her not to be silly, pate is not a bit like Champagne! After I had thought about it for a while I said “I thought Champagne came from the rack in the garage?” but she said I was just being difficult and she knew I understood what she meant really. Some people just have no sense of humour.

Having come away from home I am now worrying about what the moles might be doing whilst we are away. What if they dig enough holes around our house so that when we get back they have undermined the foundations of the house and it has fallen down? I may be exaggerating the possible risks here but in the last few days they have dug so many tunnels around the sides of the swimming pool that I can’t help wonder if they might be planning to pick it up and carry it somewhere else entirely before we get back. I wonder how many moles it takes to move a swimming pool. It sounds a bit like one of those light bulb jokes but this is serious. However there is too much to do to worry for very long!