Whose teeth marks are all over the remote control? Early indications are that they are canine, which rules out the initial suggestion I made that my Master got so fed up about the rugby on Saturday that he took it out on the remote control. I am innocent. Not only do I know that because I know I didn’t do it, the teeth marks are too small to be mine and at no point was I in that room. That leaves Shadow, Megan and Aristotle. Of course everyone tried to blame the puppy. Aristotle was in tears, saying it wasn’t him. The question is, did he have a motive and did he have the opportunity? It turns out that on the day the remote was chewed Aristotle did not spend any time on his own in the snug. He may be responsible for chewing Andrew’s wooden sword a few days earlier but that is a wholly separate incident to the current investigation. That leaves Shadow and Megan. Shadow’s response when questioned was ‘P..lease! Have I ever been known to chew things?’ She sounded more like a cat than a dog and given that she was sitting upright on a dining chair with a very supercilious expression on her face I’m wondering if she is turning into a cat. Instead of mentioning that I concern I said ‘And what about my ear? You did rather chew that!’ She shrugged and went back to washing her paws. So that leaves Megan. Megan was by this time pushed as far back into the settee as she could manage, trying to look small. ‘It was you, wasn’t it?’ I said with my paws on my hips in despair. She nodded meekly. ‘Why?’ I asked. She shrugged and said she thought it was a bit like Andy chewing the sleeves of his clothes. A sort of habit with no real reason behind it. At that point the investigation was concluded and Megan’s punishment was held over to a further meeting while the humans consider an appropriate course of action. Early morning walks are being talked about so I’m now even more glad that it wasn’t me that chewed it. Megan’s a morning dog so she might quite like that. I on the other paw will stay tucked up in bed until she returns for breakfast.
Alfie Dog with a little help from Rosemary J Kind alfie@alfiedog.me.uk
Alfie’s Diary – the Book is available at Amazon UK –https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00583ZGSA
But does it still work? That’s the main thing?!
Surprisingly, extensive testing has revealed that it does!