Our Mistress is not normal. When most people go away they take another human being, or better still their beloved dog. Our Mistress has taken a stuffed toy version of us and a hobby horse! She says the stuffed toy is because she can’t take us and she misses us, but it’s the hobby horse I’m worried about. Most people think their transport should have wheels rather than a make believer gallop and an ear that when pressed gives out clip-clopping noises followed by a loud neigh! Oh, she claims the horse is part of her fancy dress but when did you ever see a warrior princess turn up on something like that?
She’s missing us, which goes without saying. However, she has pointed out that it gives her the opportunity to wear things she wouldn’t wear around us for fear of us ruining them. Honestly, you’d think we were careless. She has also pointed out that it gives a chance for some of her bruises to clear up before we all jump on her when we’re collected and then she gets some more. To that I reminded her that the large one on her shoulder was nothing to do with any of us, but the result of two Christmas tree stands jumping off the cabinet in the garage and attacking her when she wasn’t looking. The irony of that was that they were getting a box off the shelf and had moved my little car so they didn’t drop the box on it, then just dropped things on our Mistress instead. She really can’t be trusted not to be injured. It is not always our fault – just mostly! These days I’m less often the culprit on that score.
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