Wednesday 25th May 2011

I didn’t get round to finishing my advice to young puppies, which I think is a very important subject. In fact with regards to my money making ideas, I am seriously thinking about setting up evening classes in the subject, where I could demonstrate the general principles to puppies from the area. I have a feeling that my Mistress may be less enthusiastic about this scheme, but if I presented her with a proper business proposal and could demonstrate an adequate return then I think she would accept it.

Whatever your human says, it is NOT cool to be good at obedience. Learning to open the fridge door will gain you more respect in the dog world than being able to sit and stay on command. Our humans are one step ahead of us on this one and have a fridge freezer that has the fridge as the top part. I suppose that brings you to another relevant piece of learning. Don’t confuse the freezer with the fridge. It is never good to find your tongue stuck to a block of frozen meat.

Your human needs to be loved and fussed every bit as much as you do. In general, unless they are a particularly grumpy or fastidious human, they will welcome being licked, nuzzled, cuddled up to and got into bed with. If you detect early resistance, particularly to the getting into bed, just give it time and patience for them to adjust to the idea and whatever they say don’t give up. Remember this is why you were born with such appealing eyes. Use them to full effect. Combined with the right expression you can’t fail.

Now this next one is important so listen carefully. Candles do NOT taste good even if they are the scented ones. I also find the wicks a bit stringy but this is secondary to the taste problem.

Alfie Dog with a little help from Rosemary J Kind alfie@alfiedog.me.uk