There are some things which happen which you doubt very much could happen anywhere else in the world. Of course I could be wrong, but there are so ridiculous that you can only imagine the English subjecting themselves to them. Last night my humans went to a Beetle Drive. Now if you look up Beetle on Wikipedia you will find it starts with the words ‘Beetle is a British party game…’ and there I rest my case. The object of the game is to ‘build’ which is a small exaggeration of ‘draw with a pencil’ a beetle. It becomes a ‘Drive’ at the point you play it is a group and the winner of each table moves one way round the group and loser goes in the other direction. ‘Drive’ is another exaggeration as it is very difficult in a small village hall to do anything much more energetic than walk and you certainly wouldn’t get a car through the front doors. But then, as my Mistress said which will they look back and say fondly in a few years’ time ‘Do you remember that night we did nothing more interesting than sit in front of the television at home?’ or ‘Do you remember the Beetle Drive we went to in the Village Hall?’ ? As I wasn’t actually invited then I will be talking about the former rather than the latter. Ari did suggest we went outside to see if we could find any beetles of our own to play with, but I couldn’t build up the enthusiasm.
A while ago my Mistress convinced my Master that they needed the help of a gardener. He took some convincing but was soon won round by how hard working the chap she employed turned out to be. Unfortunately he also turned out to the most unreliable and has only turned up on about 3 occasions since Christmas. One of us is going to have to plant the apple tree today and it isn’t going to be me!
Alfie’s Diary – the Book is available at Amazon UK –https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00583ZGSA
You can find short stories to read at www.alfiedog.com