Tuesday 18th June 2013 – When is a suitcase not a suitcase?

There are some days in life when reality is simply too hard to believe. My poor Master is now in dispute with the guest house he stayed in last weekend as they are trying to claim his suitcase was a person. Now I know that sounds odd but it’s hard to explain it any other way. When you book a single room for one person in a hotel it comes as a bit of a surprise when after you have left they decide to charge you an additional amount for second person. There were two single beds in the small room and he put his suitcase on the second. There were no other people but the guest house claims that the sheets were ruffled by the suitcase and therefore they needed to change the sheets and in consequence the suitcase was a person and should be paid for. As you can imagine he is not best pleased and as they charged the additional amount to his card after he left and without authority he is getting in touch with the credit card company. If that fails he is cross enough that he says he will take them to court! It’s crazy, you pay for the number of people and there was one people and nowhere else to lay a suitcase.

The other incident was more one of amusement to my Mistress. She has been reading quite a lot of Terry Pratchett books recently including Good Omens in which the representative of the devil is called Anthony Crowley. Now I know there must be many people with that name and they are probably none too pleased with Terry Pratchett, but the devil’s work is the first thing that comes to mind when she sees the name at the moment. You will also realise if you’ve been reading my diary for a while that there are fewer bodies that my Mistress holds in lower esteem than the banks. So when yesterday she had a query to resolve with the bank and looked at her original letter to find a contact name, only to see Anthony Crowley, she decided before she started that it was going to be a recipe for disaster. All she needs now is the three motorcyclists of the apocalypse to turn up and her grasp on reality will give up completely.

Alfie Dog with a little help from Rosemary J Kind alfie@alfiedog.me.uk

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