Today is the village fun day. If you come along you can get to do everything from welly throwing to plate smashing, watch jugglers on unicylces and take part in the dog show. I think one of the favourites for most people is the egg throwing contest. Teams of two have to throw a fresh egg to each other without dropping it. Then they move back a pace and throw again and gradually increase the distance they are throwing between them. The winning team is the one that can throw the egg back and forwards over the biggest gap and still catch it unbroken. The problems start when they start throwing it over-arm. That is the point where if you have your camera ready you can get to see an egg breaking all over someone! As you might guess, I’m not stupid enough to take part.
When she comes home, my Mistress needs to pack the car up ready for tomorrow. She also needs to find a spare hour to snuggle up with me so that I can tell her how much I’m going to miss her. We really are very close and being apart is no fun for either of us. If I weren’t so difficult to manage around a bitch on heat I think she’d have liked to take me with her. Ah well at least I get to be in charge while she’s away. I know my duty and I’ll be here looking after things for her.
I forgot to wish my Master and Mistress a happy wedding anniversary yesterday. It’s hard to believe it is five years since I had to miss out on their wedding. Not that I’m still bearing a grudge you understand. Each year they buy themselves a present that is linked to whatever anniversary it is. This year is wood, but they still can’t decide what to buy. It has to be something that will last. My mistress seems to think it would be a bad omen if they bought an anniversary present that had a limited life.
I forgot to tell you. I persuaded my Mistress that she could deface her car by putting the bumper sticker on it. She is now proudly advertising my diary as she drives around. How cool is that?
Alfie Dog with a little help from Rosemary J Kind email@example.com
Alfie’s Diary – the Book is available at Amazon UK – https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00583ZGSA