I have been trying to use the text facility on my mobile phone. I thought I would just send a note to my mistress to say \u201cHello it is your dog here. I just wanted to say that I am missing you. Love Alfie\u201d Now I had read in the manual that there is a thing called \u2018predictive text\u2019 which means it guesses the right words and you don\u2019t have to press the keys as many times. Unfortunately I don\u2019t think that facility can be turned on, on the phone I\u2019ve got. What my message actually read was \u201cgdjjm gt gp wmtp dmg gdpd. G jtpt wamtdd tm paw tgat g am mgppgmg wmt. Jmtd Ajdgd\u201d So unless my mistress has got a few hours to spare working out the code it seems a bit pointless. It is really hard with paws to push the right key but to have to push the same one more than once is hopeless. I have got the phone numbers set up on speed dial settings so that I only have to hit one button. I have found that I am better putting a stick in my mouth and using that to hit the keys, but then with texting I am too slow and it has moved on to the next letter before I have got the last one right. Perhaps I should try and design a more suitable mobile phone for a dog.<\/p>\n
After my phone playing such awful music when it rang yesterday I set about changing it to something more personal. My mistress has hers playing her own voice telling her \u201cYour phone\u2019s ringing, your phone\u2019s ringing\u201d so I thought maybe I would record my voice for mine. The problem was that as soon as I started howling al the other dogs joined in so I ended up with a riotous cacophony of sound. Either way it is better than the tinny music it was playing, all artificially jolly and absolutely annoying. After all that I just need it to ring again to see what happens.<\/p>\n
It really is no good. The first thing I need my mistress to sort when I get home is my bed. It just hasn\u2019t grown at the same rate that I have. When I was a young puppy I needed to gather my toys up in the other corner to make it feel less big and daunting. Now not only is there no spare room for my toys there doesn\u2019t seem to be entirely enough room for the odd leg, paw and tail either. I think I would like one such as they have just bought where the mattress is specially designed to support all my little curves. I\u2019m guessing given that I am as happy curling up on the floor, the settee or for that matter my mistress\u2019s feet that may be a little excessive, but a dog has to have standards.<\/p>\n
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