{"id":16891,"date":"2019-12-22T06:00:00","date_gmt":"2019-12-22T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/alfiedog.me.uk\/?p=16891"},"modified":"2019-12-22T06:00:00","modified_gmt":"2019-12-22T06:00:00","slug":"baby-shark-sunday-22nd-december-2019","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/2019\/12\/22\/baby-shark-sunday-22nd-december-2019\/","title":{"rendered":"Baby Shark &#8211; Sunday 22nd December 2019"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Baby Shark<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I do not want to hear <em>Baby Shark<\/em> one more time! Actually, I\u2019ve got a bone to pick with some of you. It\u2019s all the fault of those who used Baby Shark in the village pantomime last year or the year before, whichever it was. It took a very long time for our Mistress to stop being annoying and singing it. I finally thought we\u2019d knocked it out of her until yesterday. The story began the day before yesterday in reality. One of the problems of me being ill is that I\u2019m losing a lot of coat. Normally we only moult twice a year. I\u2019m working on twice a day at the moment. Our Mistress is trying to keep on top of it by giving me a gently brush three times a day, but the carpets still don\u2019t look great where I\u2019ve been lying down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Vacuum Cleaner<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s the point at which she had this vague memory of where the vacuum cleaner lives and got it out. Now, you will tell from that sentence that our Mistress does not do the vacuuming in the house very often. What I am about to tell you might help you understand why. No sooner had she plugged it in and started to clean up my spare hair, then there was a gentle pop sound, well to be honest it was more of a bang. Then there was a burning smell. So, that\u2019s the end of the vacuum cleaner. Our Mistress said \u2018But we\u2019ve only just bought it,\u2019 which in reality turned out to be seven years ago next month. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/alfiedog.me.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/IMG_8693-1024x768.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-16892\"\/><figcaption>Wilma relaxing yesterday<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Back to sharks<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Anyway, that\u2019s how we got to Baby Shark. She looked up what\nwas going to work best and came up with a make she hadn\u2019t heard of before\ncalled a Shark. It was delivered yesterday and as soon as she started trying it\nout she seemed compelled to accompany it with the singing, (I was going to say\ntune \u2013 but if you heard her sing you\u2019d know why I chose my words carefully) of\nBaby Shark. Anyway, it\u2019s just a good job she doesn\u2019t use it very often that\u2019s\nall I can say. I\u2019m having a hard enough time anyway without having to listen to\nher sing!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Alfie<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mh-excerpt\"><p>Alfie does not want to hear his mistress singing &#8216;Baby Shark&#8217; ever again &#8211; read on to find out why it all started.<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":16913,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"gallery","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[109],"class_list":["post-16891","post","type-post","status-publish","format-gallery","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-day-to-day-life","tag-alfie","post_format-post-format-gallery"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16891","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16891"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16891\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16913"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16891"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16891"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfiesdiary.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16891"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}